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I didn even try to make friends with other young women because

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Personality Dysmorphic Disorder

canada goose outlet london Last week, the DailyMail shared three photographs of three beautiful women, all of whom suffer from Body Dysmorphic Disorder. All three are convinced they are hideous, deformed freaks. (Their words; not mine.) They go through lives with heads bowed, eyes averted, feeling like they shouldn be allowed outside canada goose outlet parka with canada goose outlet reviews the normal people. They feel unworthy of love. Avoid sex. And one has decided never to pass on her genetics to a child lest she give birth to a monster. Again, her words; not mine. canada goose outlet london

canada goose outlet new york city But here the thing: All of these ladies are not only perfectly canada goose outlet uk sale normal, but even beautiful. Stunningly beautiful, in fact. canada goose outlet new york city

canada goose outlet reviews Reading that article, it all canada goose black friday sale seemed so familiar. And I not merely referring to my OCD days when I wouldn even take out the garbage without two layers of foundation thick liquid foundation under thick powder foundation. canada goose outlet reviews

canada goose outlet mall No, theDailyMail canada goose outlet store uk article reminded me of how I used to canada goose factory outlet feel about myself, as a person. How you may still be feeling about yourself right now. That what narcissistic abuse does. It gives us a case of what I calling Dysmorphic Disorder. talking about narcissistic abuse so severe that it made us feel so bad, so shameful, so unworthy, so evil, so warped, so stupid, so less than canada goose outlet shop everyone else, so awkward, so gauche, so inappropriate to life,so {insert adjective here} that we too went through life with heads canada goose outlet canada bowed and eyes averted. Felt unworthy of love. Couldn believe that anyone would ever want to have sex with us and said when we really meant And perhaps decided never to have children lest we screw them up the way our parents screwed us up. canada goose outlet mall

canada goose outlet niagara falls I walked in your shoes. I remember back to when I used to jest that takes an Act of Congress to get me out of the house every morning. I dawdled and I dallied, taking as long as I could for my morning in a cold porcelain tub. It felt safe. My one last refuge before going out in a terrifying world. Making eye contact with my seemingly confident coworkers. Rubbing shoulders with women who held their heads up and appeared to feel about themselves. canada goose outlet niagara falls

canada goose outlet seattle Dating was a bloody nightmare. My blood pressure must have been through the roof as I arrived for a date, fearing that (yet again) it would be awkward, conversation would be strained and all about him and I never hear from him again. canada goose outlet seattle

canada goose sale uk Everywhere I went, I felt like the odd woman out. The weirdo. Watched. Criticized. Gossiped about behind my back. I tried to be good, to be nice, to be smiley I still felt like a freak. So I studied manners, etiquette, even ballroom dancing. Trying desperately to feel better about myself. canada goose sale uk

So I compensated. I didn even try to make friends with other young women because, frankly, I felt like a different species. If they wore the latest styles, I wore antique rhinestone screw on earrings and colorful blouses or even gorgeous pajama tops. If they wore their hair straight and parted in the middle, goose outlet canada I wore mine short, curly and side parted with bangs. If they wore nude lipstick, I wore vivid magenta lipstick. While they clustered together at lunch, I sat alone and read The Lord of the Rings. Every day.

canada goose outlet online store Partly, I am different. Partly I was terrified of rejection. Partly it was easier not to even try to make friends with the species I longed to belong to but feared I never would. It was easier to myself than to risk rejection by them. That what Dysmorphic Disorder can do. canada goose outlet online store

canada goose outlet uk It can make you say things like, those people like you. They only tolerate me. It took years before I finally accepted that our friends liked me too. I wasn just Michael who was tolerated. No, I was really liked for myself. canada goose outlet uk

canada goose outlet germany In some ways Dysmorphic Disorder is all about healing canada goose outlet new york city your inner soul. In other ways, it about finding your niche. They intersect and inform each other. canada goose outlet germany

For example, at my first MENSA dinner, I found myself surrounded by single Mensan men, all vying for my attention. Well THAT was a first. I was accustomed to being shunned by young men. A wallflower at ballroom dances that wives would send their husbands to dance with out official canada goose outlet of pity.

buy canada goose uk But when I found my niche, oh how the tables turned. The biggest self esteem boosting change came when I was transferred to the Information Management and Technology department at my (old) job. Being surrounded by geeks was Heavenly. I finally had friends. No longer did I eat lunch alone. I never felt rejected. Even dated them. (Yes, yes, I know. It stupid to date co workers. Yes, I got burned!) buy canada goose uk

canada goose outlet store uk Then along came Michael. He liked me. He really liked me. Even when he laughing at me and calling me he still likes me. (Ha! He should talk! ) He made me feel normal. canada goose outlet store uk

canada goose outlet washington dc That when I realized: Dysmorphic Disorder is one big, fat lie! There nothing wrong with us. Oh, our narcissists wanted us to think so! So they could clamber on our downtrodden carcass to raise themselves in their own estimation. So they could control. So they could watch us bleed (emotionally) and feast canada goose outlet on it, like some kind of emotional vampire. canada goose outlet washington dc

canada goose outlet vancouver But it wasn true. We not bad. We not shameful. We not unworthy. We not evil. We not warped. We definitely not stupid. We not less than everyone else. We canada goose outlet in usa not awkward. We not gauche. We canada goose outlet sale are NOT inappropriate to life. canada goose outlet vancouver

We very nice, normal, polite, kind, mannerly and smart people who been lied to, brainwashed, mind controlled and hurt. Really, really hurt until we developed Dysmorphic Disorder. it not a life sentence. It can be cured with big injections of truth and finding your niche in society. Her readers call her the „Edward Snowden“ and „Wikileaks“ of narcissism because of her no holds barred take no prisoners approach to writing about narcissism.

canada goose outlet orlando „Narcissism Meets Normalcy“ is the real life, ongoing story canada goose outlet uk of her healing journey from being held „hostage“ by a multi generational, cult like narcissistic family. It’s gritty and real canada goose outlet , bloody and bruised, humorous and sarcastic. considers herself a „whistleblower,“ shining a spotlight on narcissistic abuse so others can also claim their freedom and experience healing canada goose outlet orlando.


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